Marion's Communication Tips

Clean Up Your Image Have you purchased any of those web bargain coupons? They're all over the place -- WagJag, Daily Deals, Social Living and more. I've scooped many of them with great success ... and then, some that were less than shining successes, like the one I used this week. I had a wedding to attend, so I figured it was a perfect time to use my voucher for manicure and haircut that I'd purchased. I'd never gone to this place before, never even knew about it, so I arrived with no preconceptions. My first impression began from the moment I pulled up in front of the shop. It seemed like a nice enough place in a neighborhood that was being revitalized and soon becoming a trendy hot spot. It struck me that this hair salon had potential, yet had clearly not kept up with the times. Apart from being dated, the thing that struck me the most was its untidy appearance.  It wasn't dirty per se, just unkept. Hair clippings were left on the floor from the cut of a previous client. The storage area enroute to the bathroom was piled with dirty pails and clothes. The baseboards were scuffed, marked and in sorry need of a repaint. The tile floor sported dust that had been dragged in. The posters on the wall had been there for enough time that the thumbtacked corners were beginning to curl ever so slightly. These surroundings left me with a sense that the shop owner didn't really care, didn't take pride in his work, and didn't give a hoot about what his clients thought or needed. All this made me wonder if I could trust him with my business. Was he competent? Organized? Professional? Mmmm, I had to wonder. This image did not match the image I had in my mind of a well-run beauty shop. Now think about your workplace. What type of impression does it give? Do your work surroundings project the image that is consistent with your brand, the quality of your work, and what you want to be known for? Does it reflect a professional and organized approach, or are all your files or supplies sprawling across your desk in complete disarray? It might be "organized confusion" for you and give a completely different message to others. For your client, colleagues and bosses, it may be shouting, "WARNING: stay away! Disorganized person works here!". Nothing may be further than the truth. However, clues lead to conclusions and people may read these environmental surroundings as warnings that your work is out of control. Why risk it? Why not stack the deck in your favor and project the image that instills a sense of confidence in your abilities? You deserve no less. It might be unfair that the world judges books by their covers. Whether we like it or not, it's also the reality. When the image you project doesn't match what people expect, that gap between expectation and reality may not serve you well. It may be making it harder for you to get the recognition, the pet projects and the rewards that you deserve.   The good news is that there's one person and one person only who controls your workplace environment, and you'll find out who when you look in the mirror. You might not control the whole workplace -- you do control your piece of it. Put the control to work and project the image that you deserve. By the way ... the haircut and manicure was OK, not great. It pretty much matched the image of the boutique itself. And that, right there, is the whole point. Next time, I'll follow my gut and my impressions and just may walk away. Your clients may do the same based on the impression you give with your workplace. You have the ability to control the image your work space projects. Take a look around you right now and ask yourself honestly, is this the impression you want to make? Is it truly a reflection of your professionalism? If not, you can change it, starting today. You've worked hard to build a great reputation and give a good impression -- let your work space reflect that. Comments about this article? Blog them below -- everyone welcome! PS: have you signed up yet to receive my weekly "Marion's Communication Tips". Visit www.MarionSpeaks.com and fill in the webform, or just email me at Marion@MarionSpeaks.com with "sign me up" in the subject line. Until next time, here's to ... Better communication, Better business, Better life, Marion Grobb Finkelstein COMMUNICATION CATALYST Keynote Speaker / Corporate Trainer / Author www.MarionSpeaks.com Marion@MarionSpeaks.com www.facebook.com/MarionSpeaks   © 2011 Marion Grobb Finkelstein WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EZINE OR WEB SITE? You can, as long as you include this complete tagline with it: Communication specialist, author, professional speaker Marion Grobb Finkelstein teaches individuals and organizations across Canada and beyond, how to improve morale, confidence and productivity by changing how they communicate. Chat with her at www.facebook.com/MarionSpeaks and sign up for her FREE weekly "Marion's Communication Tips" at www.MarionSpeaks.com

Every now and then, I get a question that so many people have asked (or want to ask), that I simply want to share it with all of you. This is one of those delicate communication situations described below. Perhaps you've found yourself in this awkward position or you will someday. Read on, and you'll have some suggestions with how to handle it.

QUESTION:

I was wondering how to approach employees on personal hygiene issues.  It's not that the individuals are dirty or filthy but rather don't use personal anti-perspirants due to whatever reason. I have other employees commenting on "how ripe" the smell is on some days!  I'd like to discuss this with the individuals and wondered how to handle it.
Signed, Holding my breath until I get an answer.

MARION'S RESPONSE:

What a tough situation -- talk about having to communicate a difficult message! Rest assured, you're not alone. I've known several people who have handled this predicament. Here's some principles of good communications and tactics I would suggest:

1. SET THE TONE: Before you do anything, get your head in the right place -- come from a place of service, not judgement. You are speaking to this person because you have information that will help them (I'll explain how in a sec). Keep the mood light and casual. If you're nervous about speaking to them, remind yourself that you're doing this to support them, not to make them feel bad. Remind yourself of the outcome you want to see -- improved relationships, better productivity (it's hard to be productive when people don't want to be around you), and maintaining the person's dignity.

2. SPEAK IN PRIVATE. You mention "individuals" (plural) -- meet with each one separately and privately. If your workspace doesn't have a door, find a corner somewhere that you can meet without anyone hearing. No one needs to know that you're speaking to them. This is a sensitive issue and the intent is to treat it delicately and respectfully. Keep it short, brief, friendly and authoritative (you're the boss, right?)

3. WHAT TO SAY. The two golden rules of offering feedback:

            1) the person feel better for having heard it; and

            2) They know what to do to improve.

With this in mind:

a) Let them know the situation

b) Explain the impact it's having on THEM (i.e., their operational effectiveness) and others and (here's the important part) why it's in their best interest to change.

c) let them know you're there to help, you support them

d) close with a thank you and how much you value them.

A few cautions:

a) Make no reference to what might be causing the body odor, or anything that might end you up in the HR or lawyer's office -- that is, make no reference to culture, gender, weight, or anything else that you might see as contributing factors. These things could be seen as personal attacks, and that's not the intent.

b) Be approachable while being matter-of-fact

c) Allow them to save face, not be embarrassed.

It could sound something like this:

"Debbie/John (fill in the blank), I wanted to speak to you because I've noticed something I think you'll want to hear. Please know that I say this in the spirit of support and because you deserve to connect with colleagues and clients to the greatest extent possible.

I find that when I'm near you, I smell perspiration or body odour. I don't know what's causing it, all I know is that I'm concerned it's affecting your ability to interact with colleagues and clients.

You deserve to feel comfortable around others, so taking care of this piece is just another way to connect. There's lots of products you can try until you find a combination that works for you. If you have any questions, I'm not an expert but I'll certainly answer questions and help you as much as I can.

I appreciate the fact that we can speak candidly. So, let me know how it's going and if you have any questions, let me know."

Hope that helps. Let me know how it goes!

(PS: Hey, if you're reading this and have had a similar incident, post your comments and let us know what you did and how it turned out... or if you're going to use the approach suggested above).

How's your response rate these days? I mean, how long does it typically take for you to respond to an enquiry or request? It could be from your boss, employee, colleague or client -- and how long you take to respond is going to make a difference to your success rate and building relationships.
 
Jay Arthur, a fellow pro speaker (http://www.lean-six-sigma-money-belt.com), advised me that in the March 2011 HBR reports that sales could benefit from cutting response times. Companies spent $22.7 billion generating online sales leads in 2009. Companies that followed up within the hour were seven times more likely to qualify the lead than companies that followed up after an hour and 60 times more likely than companies that waited 24 hours.

How are most companies doing?

• 23% never responded at all
• 24% took more than 24 hours
• 16% responded in 1-24 hours
• 37% within the hour

In other words, two-thirds of companies are throwing away their investment (that’s $14.6 billion) by waiting too long to respond. Learn from what corporations are doing wrong. Wow, that's a lot of money. Clearly, response rates matter in business.

They also matter in terms of projecting yourself as a professional. How you treat others shouts volumes of how you value them. Non-response suggests that you don't value the person making the request. Nothing may be further from the truth -- you may simply be overwhelmed, be super busy, or the request may have gotten lost in cyberspace. The person waiting for the response doesn't know any of that. All they have to judge how you value them is the way in which you respond.

I worked with a client recently who dashed off an urgent note full of angst to his boss. When the boss responded immediately (within an hour or two) by phone call, requesting the employee to call back, this employee took over a day to respond. The boss did the right thing -- immediate response to an urgent request. The employee did not.

When you don't respond in a timely manner, especially to urgent requests, and especially those from superiors or clients with time-senstive issues, you disrespect them.

Now think about it -- is there anyone you need to respond to? If the answer is "yes", do it now.

cheers,
Marion

PS: if you're having difficulty coping with all the requests to communicate, I have some strategies that I share with my coaching clients -- the first of which is change your attitude and realize how your actions may be perceived. If you're interested in being coached, drop me a line.

I'm about to tell you something  that few people know about me: I was on the silver screen in a movie. Sure, it was a bit part about 15 years ago ... and it was MY bit part. I did it!

Back track about 20 years: I was hosting cablevision shows and doing radio and TV ads, all while holding down hefty fulltime communication positions. Then, I decided I'd try my hand at acting. Being in a movie was one of those things on my "bucket list" and I figured it was worth a shot. Regardless of the outcome, I reminded myself, it would make for a good story from my rocking chair in the years ahead.

The day of the auditions, I walked into the hall in Montreal, determined to wow the casting agents with my acting abilities. Surely they would notice my subtle raise of an eyebrow, the inflection in my voice, the dramatic animation I brought to the role of the airport security agent. I was convinced it would be my acting that won them over.

A few weeks later, the call came -- I got the part! When I asked what it was that swayed their decision in my favor, I expected to hear something about my abilities, my performance, my outstanding way of connecting with the audience. Ya, right. Instead, what they told me was surprising: it was my outfit. Yup, they figured that I "looked the part", literally, and anything else I needed, they could teach me.

So let's tie that lesson into the workplace. Do you look the part that you're aiming for? Does your image project not just the job you have, but the one you want? So much of the information we gain through face-to-face communication is garnered through visual clues, it's important that we recognize this fact and use it to our advantage.

Sometimes we get gut feelings about people and we're not really sure why. Often when we analyze the "why", we discover that it's visual clues that have led us, rightly or wrongly, to certain conclusions. We see someone who is dressed slovenly, is unkempt, has dirty fingernails and food spills on their clothing, and we believe that they are as unconsientious about their work as they are about their appearance. It could be that nothing is further from the truth, but we quite naturally respond to visual clues. Perhaps this person was just in a car accident and that would explain their frazzled look. Or maybe they'd stayed up all night to complete a report for the boss; that's a good thing, right? Something to be commended, not looked down upon.

POINT: People don't know our back story, they only know how we present ourselves to them... and we may or may not have a chance to explain.

In a less extreme way, we sometimes see people dressing completely appropriately for their particular work environment, but that work environment might not be right for them. If you are expected to wear conservative suits and carry a briefcase and that's not in line with how you see YOURSELF, that's incongruent. Talk to people who have left organizations readily (sometimes skipping and singing, "I'm free, I'm free!") and they'll tell you that it's often because the image the organization had of its employees did not match the image they had of themselves.

 

It is a commonly held belief that judging a book by its cover is shallow. That may be true. It's also the way humans respond. I say, use that fact to your advantage and make your image help you put your best foot forward in the workplace.

Until next time, here's to ...

Positive communication,

Productive relationships,

Powerful results!

Marion Grobb Finkelstein

Keynote Speaker / Corporate Trainer / Author

www.MarionSpeaks.com

Marion@MarionSpeaks.com

www.facebook.com/MarionSpeaks 

 

© 2011 Marion Grobb Finkelstein

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EZINE OR WEB SITE? You can, as long as you include this complete tagline with it: Communications expert, author, professional speaker Marion Grobb Finkelstein teaches individuals and organizations across Canada and beyond, how to improve their businesses and their lives by improving their communications. Chat with her Facebook www.facebook.com/MarionSpeaks  or sign up for her FREE weekly e-newsletter "Marion's Communication Tips" at www.MarionSpeaks.com

In today's world of ubiquitous photos, cell phones, small digital cameras, and social media, it seems that people's pictures and comments are popping up everywhere.

Google yourself. Give a try, because if you've been in a job interview lately or plan on going to one in the future, chances are the organization interviewing you has googled you. Even the term "googled" -- a word that didn't exist a few years ago -- has become part of our lexicon. Times have changed. Social media changes the way we communicate.

What's on your social media pages? Or what's on the pages of others about you? Do these comments and images serve you well?

Every now and then, I pop onto a friend or colleague's Facebook page and frankly, am quite surprised at some of the things I see there: party photos of people way over the top, racial or political comments that are quite revealing of people's true sentiments, inappropriate language and unbecoming social behaviors.

Perhaps it's the seeming anonymity or the chance to finally be heard that pushes people to express themselves in outlandish ways. Don't get me wrong -- I'm all about being expressive. It's part of good communications. What concerns me is the image people project of themselves when they think no one is watching ... or maybe because they think everyone is(?).

A lot of businesses and professionals are now using Facebook business pages to maintain ongoing communications with their clients. It's about building rapport. People do business with people they know and like, and FB gives you a chance to get to know them and they, to know you.

I have a Facebook business page at http://www.facebook.com/MarionSpeaks which I use to post my articles, comments, and useful links and info. It's how I stay in touch with you in between my weekly articles. Do you have a FB account? If so, join me at my link above, click "like", and jump into our online conversations about my posts. If you've never tried Facebook, here's a perfect opportunity to do so. FB is always updating and enhancing all its features, which I really appreciate. Soon I'll be posting some videos so I can "speak" to you too!

A lot of professionals use LinkedIn and some use Plaxo to communicate. You can find me at http://www.LinkedIn.com/in/MarionSpeaks. I find the group discussions quite useful. I pipe in with my two cents worth on subjects I feel strongly about or when I think I have information that would be of use to others. I've connected with wonderful professionals, potential clients and reacquainted myself with long lost colleagues. If you want to connect with professionals, I suggest giving LinkedIn a shot.

Social media, like any tool, can be helpful or harmful. What you get out of it depends on how you use it. The best way to decide if it's for you or not is to give it a try. It's the way of the future, so ride the wave. See you on the net!

PS: visit me at http://www.facebook.com/MarionSpeaks -- looking forward to hearing from you!

Until next time,
Better communication, better business, better life,
Marion Grobb Finkelstein
Keynote Speaker / Corporate Trainer / Author

www.MarionSpeaks.com
Marion@MarionSpeaks.comMarion@MarionSpeaks.com

LET'S CONNECT!
http://www.MarionSpeaks.com/
http://www.facebook.com/MarionSpeaks
http://www.twitter.com/MarionSpeaks
http://www.LinkedIn.com/in/MarionSpeaks

© 2010 Marion Grobb Finkelstein

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EZINE OR WEB SITE? You can, as long as you include this complete tagline with it: Communications expert, author, professional speaker Marion Grobb Finkelstein teaches individuals and organizations across Canada and beyond, how to improve their businesses and their lives by improving their communications. Chat with her Facebook www.facebook.com/MarionSpeaks or sign up for her FREE weekly e-newsletter "Marion's Communication Tips" at www.MarionSpeaks.com.

Perception is a funny thing. What one person perceives as attractive, another sees as a complete turn off. What catches someone's eye, another simply disregards. What you think no one will notice about yourself, other people do.

 

Our image, how we project ourselves to the outside world, is communicated in many ways. How we talk, how we listen, and what we do are just a few examples of how we show others who we are and what we believe in. How we look physically is another.

 

Does your physical appearance and how the world perceives you match your internal perception of self? Are you really projecting the image you want? Is that image consistent with what you stand for and who you want to be?

 

Projecting a professional image is, in part, how we look. The old adage, "don't dress for the job you have -- dress for the job you want", acknowledges that how we appear physically helps to shape the way others perceive us, our roles, and our potential. Our physical image is ideally consistent with the professional image we want to portray.

 

An interesting event occurred a few months ago that reminded me of this fact.

 

I arrived at a conference to deliver a session, and a participant walked up to me and said, "oh my, you look waaaay younger in person than you do in your photo". Gasp. I didn't know whether I'd been complimented or insulted. I knew the photos of me on my website were not the best, but heck, they didn't look that bad. Or did they? I got my answer shortly after when on two other separate occasions, I received similar comments from clients. (Yes, people really do say these things).

 

I believe in the "message of 3". When I get three unrelated sources telling me the same thing, I follow what they're saying. I take it as the universe trying to tell me something, and I listen. In fact, I listen to the universe while it whispers before it feels the need to shout.

 

Clearly, it was time to update my photos, so after these several "nudges", I took the leap. I connected with a wonderful photographer who, I believe, captured the real "me". (Thank you Mario Menard, www.ottawaportrait.com for helping me show the world what was inside me all along!). My website portrait shots are now fresh and contemporary. Someone visiting my website will see a woman who is professional and approachable. My photos are now consistent with my "MarionSpeaks brand". See for yourself at www.MarionSpeaks.com and let me know what you think.

 

Is your image and how you portray yourself consistent with who you are and what you want to be? If not, I highly recommend you treat yourself to getting your photos updated to capture the "real you". Having a great portrait shot instills confidence, makes you feel good when you look at it, and tells your clients what they can realistically expect when they meet you. A good photographer will capture the essence of a person, a personality, an authentic self. Think of the outstanding portraits of Armenian-born Canadian photographer Yousuf Karsh. It was his ability to capture the seed of the person's personality on film that catapulted him to working with the world's most famous. That ability to connect the "real you" with how the world perceives you is magic.

 

Portraying yourself authentically in all the ways you communicate means having consistent messaging. It's more than "just a photo" -- it's your image. And in the final analysis, your image being consistent and authentic makes great business sense.

 

PS:  Marion please offer any comments you may have about this article on www.facebook.com/MarionSpeaks -- looking forward to hearing from you!

 

Until next time,

Better communication, better business, better life,

Marion Grobb Finkelstein

Keynote Speaker / Corporate Trainer / Author

www.MarionSpeaks.com

Marion@MarionSpeaks.com